by Cat Devon
Total paranormal romance shlock. But it was just what I needed. Unabashed goofiness, chick lit in a vampire wrapper. The info dumps were provided at the beginning through dialogue “Our special tattoos through the special ink and design keep us from bursting into flame during the day, good thing the rival vampire gangs don’t know, and I don’t know why I am telling you this since you have one and know all about it.” “Yes, I agree our tattoos are awesome and the best. We should be careful not to let anyone know that we get our blood from the local funeral home down the road after making sure the humans don’t put embalming fluid in it, and then we make the blood yummy and edible for us vampires through a process we developed so we don’t have to suck anyone’s blood the old fashioned way. You helped me develop the process but I am telling you so the reader knows.”
That was obviously my paraphrasing of things, but I almost set the book down because of it, then thought “what the hell”, the other books I am reading aren’t keeping my attention (they are driving me a little nuts because my brain can’t focus, so this book doesn’t require any work on my part – voila – spoon-fed and entertained). So my brain is turning to mush and I feel like a lazy ass who can’t read anything interesting any more. Sue me, this book has cupcakes, a goofball pink-wearing cupcake-making lead heroine who is attracting the hunky vampire next-door. Things don’t make sense in the real world or this world either. Join me in this little fantasy land of Glinda the good witch and a Mr. Darcy-esque vampire brooding guy hooking up because they have to keep her safe from rival vampire gangs who just want to know why she is kind of special.
Anyway, that is all. There really isn’t anything to write except it was cheesy and romancy and silly but ultimately I read the whole dang thing. I gave it 2 stars because it is ok, but those two stars are made of pink fondant, stuck inside a red velvet cupcake and decorated within an inch of their lives. Mmmm, take a bite, delicious and sugary and gone in seconds.